Wednesday, January 7, 2009

The cemetary in winter

I've had issues with the cemetary where Keely is laid to rest. We chose that solely because my grandmother (my beloved Marney) is. I do find comfort in Keely being next to her Great Grandma and that is where Sam and I will someday rest. I know once we pass on, we won't care but it's important to me now. We've gone 9 rounds with the caretaker about getting the grass cut; many of the families of the cemetary, not just us. Finally, some good samaritans (who I want to just give a hug to) took over and made it beautiful all summer long. We've had things stolen (if you see a little angel carrying Lilies of the Valley, let me know) and we've had strange things left there.

There are times, though, that I find such peace in her place, my heart is relieved. One morning, a fawn was resting right at her headstone. Her headstone itself is perfect: emerald green stone, the shape of an angel and the perfect verses for our perfect girl. It makes me feel good to decorate it for holidays and to find the perfect flowers for her butterfly shaped shepherd's hook.

Yesterday was one of the good days there. There was a quarter inch of ice covering the entire place and complete and total silence. I could almost hear Heaven. Even her windchimes were too heavy with ice, until I turned to go back to the car and a single note from them said goodbye to me. I had to look back once more to see the sun peek through the clouds and shimmer on the angel's ice. Such beauty.

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