The first Christmas without Keely, what should've been her first Christmas, we got a Holiday Barbie for her. I collected them as a little girl and I couldn't bear to have an empty stocking for her every year so we put her Barbie in there. As I got out the decorations, I looked long and hard at the Holiday Barbie 2007. Keely would've been 2.5 this year. This is the first year she would've been able to play with her Barbie. But Barbie is still in the box and will stay there. Forever.
I know most bereaved families have a rough patch this time of year. It's supposed to be a time to be with your family and enjoy a kind of togetherness that we can never have. So close to perfect, but it can never be. I miss my girl. My boys miss their sister. My husband misses his girl. I love this time of year. I still do. I love it and it can never be the same.
"she'll be home for Christmas, if only in our dreams"