It will have been 6 years next Tuesday that we watched that sweet heartbeat stop.
We are leaving now to go to the flower shop and choose new flowers for her grave.
Does a mother or father ever get used to choosing flowers for their child's grave? It seems that if it were going to happen, it would have by now. There are times that it feels normal but most times, I remind myself that this isn't a dream. She was real. She was here. She is gone.
We will send two dozen pink balloons plus a very special ones her brothers choose for her into the sky on Saturday.
The world will go on. We will go on. But we will take her with us in each and every breath. And beyond.
XOXO
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I don't think it will ever be alright, or ever be normal. It will be five years for us in November since Daniel's departure, and it often seems as it it happened, perhaps a year or so ago. I have trouble reconciling that he was 12 1/2 at his departure, and would be 17 in a month if he were here. There is still a missing place at the table, and he will still miss the Easter egg hunt I would do here, if he were here.
ReplyDeleteI think we will keep remembering, and keep honoring their memories. If we are lucky, we will still see them in dreams from time to time. We will raise our children on Earth and continue to walk forward until one day far in the future, when we are all reunited. I will continue to trust God, and so will you.