comfort in connections

When my Nana passed away earlier this month, I looked through thousands of photos to put in a memorial slideshow. I found significant comfort in one of them. On Keely's birthday in 2009, what would've been her 2nd birthday, we all wrote messages on a card to her, attached them to balloons and let them sail away to Heaven. Before we released them, though, I photographed them...

"Dear Keely,

I look forward to meeting you in your heavenly home. I know both my sisters are there- Marney & Rusie- to keep you company till I get to join you.

Love, Your Great Nana"

seconds in Heaven...

I haven't been sure where to record this. It's something not well understood and quite often met with skepticism, even from me. There are some things we just aren't meant to know (so says Deut. 29:29) and I consider understanding a direct connection in this physical world to the other side one of those things. I *want* to believe seeing Keely in my dreams is a little visit with her, a glimpse of her. Sometimes it might be, then other times maybe just a dream. All the same, I want to remember them. In the end, I want to remember this so I'm here, recording it.

My Nana came to my mother in a dream {if you'll recall, my Nana passed away last month}. She excitedly told her of Heaven, how she wished she'd come sooner; knowing real joy. She also told her to tell me not to say LIVING children anymore {I'll sometimes refer to my living children as that in order to include all of them besides Keely for whatever reason}. She said "Keely's LIVING, really LIVING". It brought on a rush of emotions, not the least of which was chills and gratitude. What a gift to have, even for a moment, a glimpse. Someday we'll understand...


"The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law."

missing more...

Tomorrow it will have been a week since watching my Nana's earthly life end, a week since she met my girl face to face. I feel so lucky to have that link to the other side. Lucky my girl met my Nana on the shore. Lucky my Nana will rock her until I can. So lucky and in a worldly sense, missing so very much. Life can be so short and so long all at once.

greet your Great Nana at the gates, little girl

Keely greeted my Nana this afternoon on the shore of Heaven. I find myself thinking of my Great Grandmother, Eula. A mother of 5: a stillborn boy, my beloved Marney who died in 1991 at the age of 75, Riley who died in 1927 at the age of 7, Ruth who died in 1986 at the age of 62 and my Nana Helen who passed through the gates today at age 83. For the first time, Eula has all her children together. What a joyful reunion it must be.


"when the saints get to Heaven, what a day of rejoicing that will be."